You waited a long time to become parents, going through the surrogacy process and awaiting the birth of your precious baby. After baby arrives, life is filled with getting to know this little bundle of joy and finding out what it means to be a family.
For any parent, gay or straight, just the thought of returning to work and leaving their baby in the care of someone else is difficult and disheartening. Here’s what you can do to make the process of hiring and leaving your child with a nanny a little easier.
Hire Nanny Before Birth
By the time your surrogate is in the second trimester you’ll most likely have a good idea of what your childcare situation is going to be after your baby is born. Will you, your partner, or both of you be staying home after baby is born? How long will you be able to stay home with your baby before both of you are back at work? Making plans even before baby arrives gives you time to make some important decisions about who’s going to be staying with your little one.
Finding the Right Nanny
Once you know that a nanny is the right choice for you and your family, it’s time to find the right one. You’ll want to hire someone that’s the right fit for your family and someone who’s with you for the long-term. You have two options – hire through a reputable agency or hire a nanny on your own. If you’re hiring on your own, come up with a job description that lists your family’s needs and what you’re looking for in a nanny. Be prepared to do interviews with potential applicants, do a background check, and come up with a legal work agreement.
Hire Nanny Before Your First Day Back at Work
Making the transition from being home with your baby every day to working can be a difficult one for everyone. Take away some of the stress and anxiety by starting your nanny a week or two before you have to be at work. This gives you time to walk your nanny through a few days of childcare with your baby, introducing them to the schedule. This also gives your baby time to get used to someone else. Be sure to go out and give your baby and nanny time alone together. You’ll also need get used to not being with your baby every day!
Encourage Open Communication
When you’re interviewing nannies be clear about your expectations for open communication. Come up with ways for all of you to communicate about anything and everything that happens in your baby’s day. This is even more important for parents of younger children who don’t want to miss any of the milestones of baby’s first year. Good options for communication include videos, facetime chat, and whiteboards that list important information.
Adjustment Period
Going back to work is an adjustment for everyone. You and your partner made the wonderful decision to start your own family using a surrogate. Going back to work isn’t an easy choice, but for most parents, staying home isn’t a feasible option. Finding the right nanny will make the transition easier for all of you.
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