Transitioning from Infertility to Surrogacy: Questions to Ask

Transitioning from infertility to surrogacy can prove to be a big step and requires an important conversation between you and your partner. Numerous couples spend many years and a lot of money trying to become pregnant but unfortunately, to no avail. However, despite the lack of pregnancy, your dream of parenthood is still possible. Although surrogacy will not provide you with the pregnancy experience you expected, it will still provide you with the opportunity to start a family. The decision to give up the experience of pregnancy can be extremely difficult, so how do you decide when you are ready to transition to surrogacy? 

The best way to determine if surrogacy is right for you is by speaking with your partner, fertility doctor, and surrogacy professional. Together, your doctor and surrogacy professional will provide you with an idea of what to expect from the process and whether or not you meet the required criteria regarding surrogacy. However, the decision to pursue surrogacy ultimately resides with you and your partner—hence why it’s extremely important to discuss if surrogacy is the right infertility option for your personal situation. 

Although it’s important to speak with medical specialists, there are vital questions you and your partner should ask yourselves before beginning the transition to surrogacy. 

Are you ready to give up on your other infertility treatments?
Usually, Intended Parents transitioning to surrogacy have gone through years of treatments—unfortunately, without success. When couples begin considering surrogacy, it’s because their current or previous infertility treatments have not resulted in pregnancy. If you currently find yourself in this situation, then surrogacy may potentially be the next step for you and your partner. Similar to other processes, surrogacy requires time, money, and energy—which in order to be successful should not be split with other methods.

Are you interested in pregnancy more than parenthood?
One of the biggest challenges for Mothers transitioning to surrogacy is foregoing the chance to carry their child to term themselves. Intended Parents have dreamt of the chance of becoming pregnant and giving up on that dream can be extremely difficult. Unfortunately, accepting this reality is vital to having a successful surrogacy experience.

Intended Parents that choose to pursue surrogacy do so in order to achieve their goal of becoming parents. Once they realize and accept that having a child is the ultimate goal—not being pregnant—they are more willing to embrace the surrogacy process.

Are you prepared to let someone else carry your child?
When you let go of the drum of being pregnant yourself, you must also accept that someone else will be carrying your child and having control of your baby’s in vitro development. This reality is one of the biggest challenges for Intended Parents—especially mothers. Surrogacy is an extremely intimate partnership between Intended Parents and the Surrogate, and you both must be prepared for the partnership before you begin the process. Despite signing legal documents with your Surrogate outlining your expectations, you must be able to trust and rely on your Surrogate throughout the entire process.

What to do with your leftover embryos?
Occasionally, when transitioning to surrogacy, intended parents have remaining embryos from their in-vitro fertilization process. Since it’s understood that implantation in the Intended Mother’s uterus will likely result in failure, they opt to use their remaining embryos to have a child in a process likely to succeed. If you do have any embryos remaining, consider speaking with your infertility doctor about the possibility of surrogacy using your embryos.

Have you discussed all your options?
Speaking with your infertility doctor or counselor regarding all of your medical options is extremely important. Unfortunately, due to various circumstances, surrogacy may not be the perfect solution for everyone’s situation. Before transitioning to surrogacy and investing both time and energy into the process, speak with your doctor to ensure it’s the best option for you and your partner.

Do both you and your partner agree about surrogacy?
As with every family-related decision, it’s extremely important that you and your partner are fully committed to the process. Surrogacy evidently requires emotional investment, so if you or your partner are not equally invested, then you will likely encounter challenges throughout the process.

Have you researched exactly what is required?
Finally, before transitioning to surrogacy from infertility, it’s important to understand everything that is required of both you and your partner. Surrogacy is an intricate process that requires full commitment from all parties involved. Following a discussion with a surrogacy professional and your infertility doctor, you can determine whether or not the surrogacy process is the best option for your personal situation. 

Even though many women and couples experience difficulties becoming pregnant for various reasons, surrogacy provides them with the ability to experience pregnancy firsthand. Regardless of the underlying issue causing pregnancy difficulties, starting a family is still possible with the use of a Surrogate and Simple Surrogacy. Our specialists are available to discuss your options in complete confidentiality—providing you with comfort and security as we find the perfect solution to making your dream of parenthood a reality. 

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