The last place any new parent wants to be is the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (or, NICU) – and for good reason. Babies end up needing to spend some time in the NICU for any number of reasons, although premature births are the most common. Whatever the reason, keep reading for some helpful tips and guidance should you find yourself in the NICU.
First, understand that the tornado of emotions you’re experiencing is completely normal, and the members of your team here at Simple Surrogacy are here for you in whatever capacity you need – including if you just need someone to talk to about what you’re experiencing, and to help you manage your emotions. This journey has enough unknowns as it is, and we’re here to make this as easy on you as a high-stress situation can possibly be. The goal is simple: a healthy baby.
Next, is the financial reality of the situation. Extended hospital stays and the resulting medical expenses incurred for your Surrogate and/or newborn will be your responsibility. You will also be responsible for lost wages, childcare, and housekeeping expenses, the specifics of which will be determined per your contract with your Surrogate. You may also need to supply your Surrogate with a breast pump, nursing supplies and any additional compensation if your Surrogate is going to provide breast milk for you to use. We recommend that you identify who your best on-site support is at the hospital. Often, this will be the hospital social worker, who can be a wonderful resource for both general guidance and on-site support.
This next part depends on your individual situation: if your Surrogate and their hospital are local, then the next will not pertain to you. However, if you are going through this part of the journey in an unfamiliar setting, then depending on the severity and cause of the NICU stay, seeking long term housing may be your best bet for keeping costs down. Having a home base that isn’t just some hotel will help your mental state, and go easier on the wallet.
Finally, be there for your Surrogate. Surrogates can feel like they’ve let you down if the baby needs to be in the NICU – not to mention, the physical and emotional toll taken on Surrogates when their pregnancy journey ends less than ideally, is considerable. If it’s possible to let your Surrogate see the baby, that can be hugely helpful, as can keeping her updated on the baby’s status after the fact. It may not be her child, but odds are she has a sincere interest in the baby’s wellbeing all the same.
No two deliveries or NICU stays are the same, but your team at Simple Surrogacy will be here for you no matter how your Surrogate journey concludes. Please contact us with any additional questions about NICU stays or surrogacy in general.
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